Ups and downs.

I’m emotional and sometimes I allow my emotions to totally take over.  I am learning that I need to keep them in check.  The emotions I feel are often the result of the thoughts that float around my head, often in incomplete sentences, and even more often I’m unaware of exactly what they are saying.  According to wikipedia, the average person has 70,000 thoughts a day.  That’s a whole lotta thoughts.  My default patterns are to focus on the negative, on the problems and to play the victim.  This gets me nowhere…actually, it leaves me worse off because it creates a spiral down effect.  But, I have a choice in what I choose to believe and how I see things.  Yesterday I got to talk to one of my close friends back in the States, and I was super grateful for the wisdom and perspective that she offered.  She reminded me that I can either be problem focused or solution oriented.  Being solution oriented and proactive is going to get me a lot further if I desire to be used by God.  And she’s totally right.  And truth be told… NOBODY want’s to be around a ‘Debbie Downer.’  (please watch the SNL skit if you haven’t seen it!)

And so – I just wanted to share this to encourage others if you find yourself fighting a similar battle.

Here are some things that I find are helpful when I feel like I’m being bombarded by flaming arrows of negativity…

Read scriptures in the bible.  I believe this is the best way to fight off the ‘lies’ that are floating around in my head – with scriptures = the ultimate truth.  Choose to believe the truth.  Choose to believe God’s promises.  Use the bible as your sword!  2 Corinthians 10:3-5   “³ For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. ⁴ The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. ⁵ We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”  A book that helped me a ton in this area of spiritual thinking is ‘Mind Change’ by Thomas A. Jones.

Journal & pray.  Sometimes I don’t even know what I’m feeling or what those thoughts are exactly.  I just know that I’m feeling down…or in a funk.  It helps me to sit down and journal or pray and try to get to the root of why I might be feeling the way I’m feeling and the thoughts that are surrounding that.  And God wants to know what’s really on your heart not what you think you ‘should’ say.  For example…  I was feeling depressed.  I felt trapped and helpless and useless which then made me want to just crawl in a hole.  Then, it was easiest for me to be the ‘victim’ and blame others for why I was feeling the way I was feeling and why my circumstances were the way they were and why they would not get any better.  This only made me feel worse and then I was frustrated with people around me because it was ‘their fault’ and nothing would change until they did.  See the pattern here?  See the problem?  I totally didn’t take responsibility for anything.  The only person I have control over is myself – and so it’s up to me to change.  Whether that means I need to change my perspective or my approach or something else…

Be solution oriented instead of problem focused.  It’s easy to see problems and to be negative.  It’s more difficult to try to find solutions.  But it’s SO WORTH IT.  So fight to find the solutions.  Force yourself to.  And don’t be afraid to think outside the box… like, WAY outside the box.  Because remember, God can do so much more than you could ever ask for or imagine!

Attitude of gratitude.  Choosing an attitude of gratitude is also a great way for me to stop the continuous flow of negative chatter that can consume my brain.  Philippians 2:14   “Do everything without grumbling or arguing…”  A great book that helped me with this was “Today we are rich” by Tim Sanders 

Phone a friend.  Talking with a friend can help you gain perspective.  I am sooooo grateful for the incredible women in my life that call me higher and help me to climb out of the ‘dark hole’ when I feel I’m ‘stuck’ there.  I am grateful for these friends because they listen to me, but then they don’t join the ‘Pitty Party’ – they lovingly speak the truth and invite me to leave the Pitty Party behind.  Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”  Ecclesiastes 4:12 “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.  A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

Jam out.  I love listening to music.  Like, LOVE.  I think part of why I like it is because I find it challenging sometimes for me to articulate how I’m feeling or what I’m thinking.  Music can help me or it can hurt me – if I sit and listen to ’emo’ songs for an hour or two, I definitely feel more miserable.  But, there is also plenty of music out there that inspires me and pushes me to sieze the day and be my best for God.  I have a playlist and it’s called “Carpe Diem” – which means ‘Sieze the Day’.  It includes songs like (and please forgive the cheezy youtube videos – I just linked them so you can listen to the song if you want):  “I want to set the world on fire” by Britt Nicole, “It’s your life” by Francesca Battistelli, “Farther Along” by Josh Garrels and others… and I’m always looking for more songs to add.  So go make a playlist that inspires you and jam out to it!  (I love Spotify for making playlists – it’s also a great place to find new music)

Catch a vision.  Sometimes it’s hard for me to see beyond me and my current situation so watching a movie can also help to inspire me and give me perspective.  I think that’s why I really enjoy documentaries – they help me to open up my eyes to a world that is so much bigger than me and my problems.  And there are a lot of people out there that are doing incredible things and are hugely inspirational!  So find some movies that inspire you!  Some of my favorites:  “The Inn of the Sixth Happiness” , “Like Stars on Earth” ,  “God Grew Tired of Us”,   “Soul Surfer”,  “To Be and To Have”,  “Born into Brothels”

Share with others.  I have a hunch we can all struggle with this so it’s always great to go and encourage and inspire other people around you.  When I’m focused on other people and trying to find ways to meet their needs and encourage them, I don’t have all that extra time to spend thinking about everything that’s ‘wrong’ in my life!

Please feel free to share other things that help you or other songs or movies or books or whatever!!!  Thanks for stopping by!